Personal

A collection of my favorite posts on my life and journey that don’t concentrate exclusively on withdrawal in chronological order since I started my blog. My views have not all remained completely stagnant. I’m on a evolving journey. For info on withdrawal in particular see the “About” page.

Update: for clarifications sake about the journey I am now facing I’m linking to this first post out of chronological order because I think it’s important to know I’m not dealing with depression I’m dealing with drug induced chronic fatigue.

So I start my story with where I am today 5/31/08 because it sheds light on my whole journey. Fatigue has been the major issue since my withdrawals began. The rest of the links are in from the beginning of my blog to the most recent posts.

17 Responses
  1. 2008 May 9
    janek permalink

    It’s too late for me. I was yanked off of klonopin in October pretty much cold turkey. Other antidepressants before that. I am on a small amount of ativan and a small amount of an MAOI which I am trying to get off of. I can hardly walk up my driveway let alone get to a naturopath who says he can help me. Just waiting to die. Does anyone know of other people in this situation that survived?
    janek,

    Gianna said: I answered Jane in an email.

  2. 2008 May 9
    giannakali permalink

    It’s not too late…I do know of people who have survived…look at this post:

    http://bipolarblast.wordpress.com/2007/05/02/a-support-group-for-those-looking-for-natural-alternatives-for-psychiatric-care/

    In the support groups listed you will find many people who have suffered as you are suffering and those who have recovered.

    I hope to see you there as I’m a member of all of them…

    I too am suffering and expect relief because I’ve seen again an again that people do indeed recover.

  3. 2008 August 25
    Rochelle permalink

    All -

    Please forgive my brevity, but I’ve been reading in fascination for hours. I’ve never posted anywhere before so it’s a little confusing for me

    I’m having HELLLLLLLL with lamictal. I have a dr’s appt in the next hr and I know he’s gonna say it’s all in my head

    HELP

  4. 2008 August 25
    giannakali permalink

    Hi Rochelle,
    I’m sorry I’m not really in a position to help you at this point.

    The only thing I can suggest is trust your gut and if you feel your doctor doesn’t listen to you find someone else that does if that’s an option…

    Please come back and let us know how it goes and you can tell us more about what your situation is if you care to.

    best to you,
    Gianna

  5. 2008 August 28
    Rochelle permalink

    giannakali -

    well i did see my psychiassachrist monday afternoon. please pardon my profession correction.

    i showed up at his office in tears, practically wailing. my beloved husband went with me because i couldn’t drive. he had the audacity to ask me what my previous med’s are and recommended adding either depakote or paxil. at that point i became very angry. i told him “i’m the nut, why is he asking me what med’s i’ve taken when it’s right in front of him on my chart?” i refused more med’s and wanted a decrease in lamictal because an increase in lamictal from 200 to 400 made me a complete space cadet/vegetable, etc.

    my other med’s include 300 mg desyrel and 1 mg klonopin.

    he assured me there would be no withdrawals by cutting my lamictal from 400 to 200. i found this comment to be beyond startling, based on what i’ve read here.

    he ushered me out of his office quickly, while i was still wailing (no exaggeration) and had the next “victim” in his office before i was even out the door. needless to say, i will no longer be a guest in his office.

    i’ve been on 5 antidepressants along with lamictal in the last 8 months, resulting in not a rollercoaster ride, more like the zipper if anyone remembers that.

    i’m also fighting fybromyalgia, interstitial cystitis, tmj, etc. (whine, whine, whine).

    i’ll spare additional comments for now. i do want to say how much i appreciate this website and all of the information. we all suffer so much and so often i find myself not even wanting to talk, much less post. to everyone who posts, you are truly angels on our shared earth and i thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    i look forward to feedback.

  6. 2008 August 28
    Rochelle permalink

    all -

    sorry for all the posts, but i’m new.

    in 2002, when i was 40, i was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer. i underwent several surgeries, but only had lumpectomies, not mastectomies. i received extremely intense chemotherapy because i chose to participate in a clinical trial. i took all of the chemo in 3 months that i was supposed to get over 6 months, then radiation and the 5-year tamoxifen regimen.

    my question – has anyone experienced the severe depression, anxiety or all the other fun and games after this type of intense cancer treatment? i’m wondering if there might be a correlation.

    thanks in advance

  7. 2008 August 28
    Rochelle permalink

    all -

    yet another post, please be patient with me.

    i’m in the process of trying to gain admission to Mayo Clinic or Cleveland Clinic.

    has anyone been treated at either of these facilities? was treatment successful? what doctors were used?

    thanks so much, i’ve had so much crammed in my head for so many years.

  8. 2008 August 28
    giannakali permalink

    Rochelle,
    I’m not able to manage the blog right now and give you a thorough response. I would like to say that tamoxifen has been associated with severe depression for some time. I don’t know enough about it but I can certainly imagine it has a lot to do with your circumstance.

    best to you…

  9. 2008 August 28
    Rochelle permalink

    giannakali -

    i’ve read your not feeling your best right now. i appreciate you and the other members taking any of their time to help me.

    take care of yourself!

  10. 2008 August 28
    Rochelle permalink

    All -

    My latest depression/anxiety which has now lasted a year began at approximately the same time i was diagnosed with a potassium deficiency. i’ve read some of us share that commonality. what did you do to correct it?

    Also, my rheumatologist recently tested me for a Vitamin D defiency and I was VERY deficient. She pointed out that most doctors don’t even know to check Vitamin D levels. She strongly suggested to me and my mother that we have the levels checked regularly, at least when we have our annual physicals.

    FYI, hope it’s pertinent.

  11. 2008 August 28
    giannakali permalink

    Rochelle,
    If you want group support I recommend your joining Safe Harbor.

    http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/safeharbor2/?yguid=312848772

  12. 2008 August 28
    Rochelle permalink

    All -

    I’m very sorry if I’ve misinterpreted or misunderstood this site. Isn’t this forum a support group too? Does everyone see everyone’s posts?

    Thanks!

  13. 2008 August 28
    j12 permalink

    Hi Rochelle,

    I’m sorry you’re having a tough time right now, too. I’m not sure, but the way she described herself right now may be very similar to your own suffering. No doubt it was extremely hard for her to answer your post, but she did it anyway. (She’s a good person!) I haven’t seen her writing in 3 days, but she obviously wanted to try to help you since she understands your pain so well. I just found her this summer, while trying to help a loved one, but her blog (and Gianna) have quickly become very dear…I hope you take her advice about Safe Harbor, and I’ll start praying for you, too, along with GK and everyone else who suffers like this…may you have the patience, the hope and love you need to get through this…

    j

  14. 2008 August 28
    j12 permalink

    Hey Rochelle,

    Just another thought or two, as you search for healing words of wisdom… You’ve been through some stuff! Your profession correction made me laugh…Most docs have their hearts in the right place, but they’ve had their training in the wrong place, in my opinion. Have you checked out Dr. Mercola and alternative health docs like him who recommend at least one hour of unprotected–like that word lol–sunlight for things like natural vitamin D formation, anti-depressive therapy, as well as cutting cancer rates by 50%? And there seems to be lots of info on no-grain diets to help with the RA you mentioned. Just read your posts again and wondered if you have ever heard of him–His videos on You Tube aren’t too bad, sometimes! Take care–

    j

  15. 2008 August 28
    Rochelle permalink

    J -

    Thanks dear. I know Gianna is a dear too. How she could even get this all together after reading what she’s been through is utterly astounding.

    I have submitted my application (lol) to Safe Harbor – don’t know if I’ll be accepted or not.

    Hope to continue to hear from folks.

    Thanks again.

  16. 2009 April 16
    Chris Lane permalink

    Gianna ~

    Thanks for your blog. I thought this interview with David Healy on bipolar disorder might possibly interest you and your readers:
    http://blogs.psychologytoday.com/blog/side-effects/200904/bipolar-disorder-and-its-biomythology-interview-david-healy

    Best regards,
    Chris Lane

  17. 2009 April 16
    giannakali permalink

    thank you Chris!

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